Food frets of a worry wart Mummy

*This is going to be a long rant from Mum!

Perhaps I’m being a worry-wart for nothing or perhaps this is something that needs looking into, I don’t know but I am a little worried. I know every baby is different but sometimes you can’t help but wonder, ‘Why hasn’t my baby done this/that?’. One of my constant worry is about her food. I have been told that she is doing well growth wise but somehow I feel that her progress with types of food has been stunted due to my anti-messy baby syndrom.

I’ll admit that I get very worked up and stressed when I see her messy with the finger foods that I sometimes give her which most of the time gets squashed up and not eaten at all. As a result of that, I rather feed her or just break off bits so she can pick them up individually and feed herself. That works for me becuase the mess is minimal. But the downside is that I don’t think she has learnt the textures of certain foods eg what foods she can hold very tightly and it will not get mush and what should be held gently. Everything that she holds, she squashes and ends up not eating at all. I guess I’m one of those people who hate seeing food wasted like that.

Although the nurse has been telling her that she should be on finger foods, I do try but worry, again, since she doesn’t eat much that way. So I’m still giving her moi [rice porridge] with carrots, celery, pumpkin [at least 2 or 3 vegs] with minced pork/chicken/fish. I’ve just started mincing the meat since I realised that she can eat that. Before this, it was just a chunk of meat for the protein. Sometimes it’s something really simple like a poached/scrambled egg, veg/chicken/tuna patties, mashed potato and if I’m super lazy, then it’s just bottled baby food which is rather rare coz gawd, they are ghastly! She loves bread so when I feel that she hasn’t eaten well for the day, it’s bread and butter for her.

I really am very confused but as they say, when in Rome, do as the Romans do so I try to follow the mat salleh style of feeding here but when I talk to people back home, it’s alway moi, moi, moi!!! COMPUSED LA!!! Part of me thinks that there is no harm in eating moi* for awhile because I grew up that way and I turned out fine but apparently the nurse didn’t quite think it was ok and did repeat a few times that I should be giving her more and more finger foods. Arrgghhh……damn blur and so stressed out about this!! Really envy those kids who eat everything and parents who have no troubles like this. *sigh sigh* No thanks to the rubella the other day which really spoilt her appetite big time!!

*Boiled rice porridge

On top of all that, I have totally decided to wean her off the breast and I think I’m 90% there. When I spoke to the nurse about it, it’s either go cold turkey or do it gradually but since Arianna has stopped drinking from a sippy cup [no thanks to Mum!!] because I actually warped the thing when I dunked it in boiling hot water, she was been taking water from the bottle. I know, I know, instead of progressing forward, I went backwards and now I am in a rut! I couldn’t believe that she could suck on a straw at 6 months but at 1, she just ends up chewing on the straw instead of sucking on it!! *pengsan* So since she was mainly on the breast and bottle, I was told to move on to the sippy cup or a cup and get her used to drinking milk from it. I wasn’t suppose to substitute her current feeds with the sippy cup but constantly give her eg. 50ml throughout the day like during meals or snacks. This is because she associates the milk with nap time which I think is nothing wrong at all. I personally feel that as long as she gets her milk during the day, it doesn’t matter when she has them or if she wants to associate it to nap time. After all, don’t most kids have a drink before bed anyway? Milk always helps with sleeping anyway so that’s the bit that I’m not following at all.  It was a concious decision to do it my way. Plus, my boobs aren’t really suffering at all. I think they are close to drying up coz it didn’t feel full at all despite not feeding her for a whole day. I only caved in last night because was too lazy to get the milk ready. *snigger snigger* I think I will bf her only at night to help her get back to bed coz I really think there is hardly any milk left for her and that suction of hers - aiyo, very sakit lor!! I thought that I would feel guilty about giving up bf her but somehow dep down, I feel relieved that I have stopped. I think it was about time and my body was definitely telling me that by not producing as much milk as I expect it too.

Another thing was whether it was going to be cows milk, formula or soy. Ted’s totally against cows milk and apparently formula is more for kids who are poor eaters and according to the nurse, Arianna didn’t fall under that category so we started giving her soy milk. It’s nothing like the soya bean milk [tau chui] back home at all. It’s pretty bland but more creamy - does that make any sense at all?? Arianna didn’t quite take to it at all so after trying a few times, I decided to try with cows milk and voila, she took it a whole lot better so I decided that cows milk it will be. But like I said, Ted is not happy with the idea because ’she is not a calf’ so he insist that we get formula. Hence, we will be checking and deciding what to start on because apparently it’s ok to take formula even if the child is or isn’t a good eater. O, and we will need a new sippy cup too.

Gosh, if only these nurses and doctors get their ideas and thoughts aligned, I wouldn’t get any MORE confused!!!!

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6 Responses to “Food frets of a worry wart Mummy”

  1. 1
    Maverix Says:

    (This post really touched me and I’m about to ramble here… so be forewarned)

    I feel your pain.
    In my 1st year as a mom, I went through this dilemma too. Medical professionals and child development consultants all had differing opinions and some of their views couldn’t seem to be implemented on my child and I’d get worried or frustrated.

    Then a good friend of mine brought me to my senses. She casually mentioned that child-rearing has been an age-old profession and our ancestors (including our parents!) didn’t have to rely on all these ‘vital information’ yet the human race still flourished with healthy, intelligent and happy people.

    And then my mother gave me a great piece of advice:
    Mothers know best.

    And it’s true. We DO know best. Because we WANT what’s best for our child.

    Once I got rid of all that worry, I enjoyed motherhood a LOT more, to the benefit of both my child and me :)

    All the best!

    BTW, I personally think that you’re doing an excellent job with your daughter. She’s obviously thriving under your care.

    Maverixs last blog post..Mikhail’s Merdeka

  2. 2
    dr Says:

    I haven’t been to your blog for a while. Every baby progresses differently so take comfort in that she’s eating well and is healthy. Self-feeding is messy. No matter how you try, it will be very messy. I just close my eyes and let my girl feed herself. More like no choice cos’ she refuses to let me feed her these days so we just let her be.

  3. 3
    aida Says:

    mess is mess lor, they hv to learn mah. i still also feed ava myself, cannot break the asian habit..lol

    as for the milk, if she is generally healthy, you can offer calcium in other sources. obviously milk is the easiest. we gave ava cow’s milk after she turned 1 but it was what available. you can give yoghurt, but difficult to find high fat yoghurt. you can give formula but its expensive lor. soy can give, but from what i heard. it makes kids grow lactose intolerant, dont know how true though.

    aidas last blog post..I miss my mother

  4. 4
    Babybooned Says:

    i’m with maverix here. i really really feel for u when i read this entry coz i went through the same thing in gibran’s first year. and then i got fedup and decided to just do everything according to instinct. gib ate porridge twice a day everyday till he was about 12 months old and then it was everything we ate, he ate. i fed him alllll the way till a few months back when he started insisting on feeding himself, then i let him feed himself and still until now the mess totally gets to me! so i still guide him when he feeds himself because its less mess that way. and ure so right!!!… they dont eat as much when they feed themselves, kan? so professionals and doctors whatnots can go to hell la… i want my baby to have a full tummy! hehehe. what can i say except maverix is right!.. mummies know best! u know arianna best, and she’s growing up so healthily, so jgn risau so much ok… u’re doing great, honestly!

    Babybooneds last blog post..Melbourne Zoo

  5. 5
    Misty Mom Says:

    awww….thank u so much, ladies!! u have no idea how relieved and lega i feel that i wasn’t alone on this. i really appreciate the feedback. :) i still have to remind myself that *I* know best. :)

    thanks again!!! *muaks muaks muaks*

  6. 6
    Vien Says:

    Ah..finally ppl knocked some senses into you. I don’t have to say much. :P If Arianna is growing healthily, just continue to do what you have been doing. My mom always say our generation relies too much on books. She said can die wor..hahaha..so, sometimes, we still have to consider the older generation opinions and teachings.

    Viens last blog post..On this day…

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